It’s approaching that time of the year again. Summer, festival season. Line ups will be completed soon, if not already, and decisions must be made which one to go to. Planning what to take to a festival can be somewhat of a stressful experience for first time goers and even for the more experienced. Here I present you with a festival checklist. My aim is to make your life easier by highlighting the problems people often encounter, demonstrate how you can travel lightly and how to prevent a first-hand learning curve for you.
Festival Ticket
Arguably the most important possession when trekking to the green muddy fields. If you’re travelling from let’s say Wolverhampton up to T in The Park in Perthshire, the last thing you want is to do a U-turn back down the M6 because you forgot them. Take responsibility for your own ticket. However, if you are the type that turns up at 3:45 when you arranged to meet your friends at 3:00 for a Starbucks, I suggest you hand your ticket to a more responsible acquaintance.
Tent
A waterproof tent would be useful. As tempting as the ‘showerproof’, ‘1-Man Tresspass Pop up Tent’ may be at a cheap price of £14.99, don’t succumb. Treat yourself to a spacious, waterproof enclosure. Enough room for you or how ever many people, plus additional space for your gear. At the end of the day, you don’t need a puddle of rain water, and you certainly don’t want a puddle of urine from a fellow happy camper who takes his aim at your weekend retreat. Please also bear in mind that this is your home for the weekend. As funny as it might seem to put on an improvised helmet by way of an empty cardboard Carlsberg case and use your tent poles as jousts for a dual, it sincerely won’t be amusing when they shatter.
Sleeping Bag & Pillow
The campsite can become rather brisk as night descends down on the fields. A nice thick sleeping accompanied by a heavenly feathered pillow will feel like a home comfort. Without a sleeping bag to come back to after a long day of festival antics, your night will be as cold, and as enjoyable as a winter BBQ in north Russia.
Roll Mat
As thousands arrive through the festival gates, it’s sometimes impossible to claim a flat piece of grass for your pitch. Especially if you are a late comer. Take a Roll Mat. All be it, it’s not exactly a waterbed but it is certainly more comfortable than the root of a tree that is situated beneath the tents ground layer. For a more luxurious festival: air beds.
Wellies
Thinking the ground will be like St Andrews golf course is an extremely optimistic notion. Trade your sparkly new ‘Nike Huarache’s’ for a steady pair of wellington boots. If you are the sort that feels obliged to spend your months wage from the Saturday job in the cafe on some ‘Hunter’ wellington boots, feel free.
Camping Chair
An important factor for some chill time. Sit back, relax and take in the festival scenery. Put on your ‘Tortoise Clubmaster Sunglasses’, grab a cider and spend some time people watching. Don’t make the mistake of fetching a fishing stool, you’ll have a numb backside and you’ll simply have a torrid time.
Toilet Roll
For first time festival goers: the toilets get disgusting after 15 minutes. Loo roll is lightweight, so take plenty of it. The festival loos may provide some, but be savvy and don’t take risks on this one.
Clothes & Waterproofs
It can be very easy to over pack with clothes. Don’t take your whole wardrobe and avoid white at all costs. 3 pairs of jeans. 4 T-shirts – avoid being the guy who wears something like ‘Bantersaurus Rex’ on your tee. If you’re a uni student that once constructed a long sword out of empty cans and duct tape, you are likely to be this person. On the off chance it’s sunny, take shorts. When wearing shorts, wear long socks. This will avoid the agonising snake bit feeling of your skin being ripped by the rubber on your wellies. A couple of warm hoodies are an essential; they provide an extra layer when sleeping and they will keep you snug long into the night time.
As much as you despise the Helly Hansen waterproof you used to wear back in the school yard days of year 9, take it. It will most likely still fit you. Waterproofs jackets are imperative for a UK festival.
Food
Often where festival goers over pack. Tinned fruit is perfect to keep energy levels up, take cereal bars, ready chopped carrot sticks, snack food such as crisps and biscuits. When you are packing and you’re about to load in the selection of different cheeses ask yourself “do I really need this?”. As much as you may fancy yourself to be the ‘I’m a Celebrity get me out of here’ jungle chef, leave the camping stove at home. You will find yourself becoming very popular and will be making bacon sandwiches for everyone. It will prove to be time consuming. Leave it, it’s likely someone else will volunteer for that role. Have at the very least one full meal a day. There will be reasonably priced takeaways all over the site, get amongst the festival cuisine. Leave behind the unnecessary picnic cutlery and camping flasks – it’s not the Duke of Edinburgh award after all.
Drink
Cans of your chosen tipple are a steady consistent refreshment. Take into consideration, carrying a few cases can prove to be heavy. Take a selection of cans and ready mixed spirits to ease the carrying load. Cartons of wine for the more sophisticated. Once the wine carton is empty, take the foil and blow air into it; you have an ergonomically sound camping pillow. You’re welcome.
As for the risqué underage, you are site security’s favourite people. Unless you’re a kind hearted young person that enjoys giving away your Kopparberg mixed fruit, don’t bother. Take proof of age with you.
Torch
A wind up torch preferably. It can a handy tool when searching for your Jaffa Cakes at night time inside your tent. A torch inside you tent can also enable a time of reflection with your friends just before you nod off for some rest.
Empty Water Bottles
Remember that traveling light is the key. Take two empty 5 litre bottles and fill them up when you arrive at the campsite. Water points are situated all over the campsite. For those who simply don’t want to travel down to the campsite toilets, an empty water container can be handy. However, don’t present it to your untrusted friends; someone may receive an unwelcomed golden shower.
Bin Bags
Bin Bags are often overlooked in the world of festival essentials. Without a doubt the most versatile essential. They enable you to keep your campsite tidy (not that you will). Use a bag for your muddy wellies, locate them in your porch way, where even if rain does seep through they will remain dry in the bag. If you somehow obtain a hole on your tent exterior you will be able to patch it up with bin bags.
Contraceptives
An important one. Most festivals, as a rule hand out contraceptives but don’t take chances and not bring any. On the off chance you forget it’s your friend’s birthday you also have party balloons covered.
Money
Don’t worry about physical taking money. Festivals have cash points located on site. Locate an emergency £10 in a pocket you don’t normally use, if at the end of the night you need some food, take the £10 and immerse yourself in a Southern Fried Chicken utopia. Repeat the process for each night.
Always keep your money and valuables on you. Festivals have become a cash cow for thieves, don’t leave any money or valuables in your tent where possible. Don’t make the classic mistake of putting a padlock on your tent, this is a clear indication valuables are inside the tent. Your tent isn’t the chamber of secrets, the material is flammable and easily slashed with anything sharp.
Toiletries
Take a toothbrush and tooth paste. Hand sanitiser: a blessing for obvious reasons. Wet wipes will be your festival shower. The rest is self-explanatory.
Mobile Phone
Take a look in your fathers clutter drawer. Somewhere amongst the used AA batteries and lightbulbs will be the legendary Nokia 3310. Charge this the night before you go to the festival, you can bet it’ll last all weekend with ease, not to mention its durability as a weapon. By all means take your iPhone but use it only for capturing special moments.
There you have it. Your festival checklist. Follow the above to avoid being a trial and error pioneer. Enter your chosen festival with confidence.
Words by Aaron Spencer
@aaronlspencer